Q-Tip OCD

When I travel, I carry around a little plastic travel-sized Q-tip container. It is the perfect travel companion which can hold 30 Q-Tips if you line them all up.

I get genuine pleasure out of coming home from a trip, emptying out the now-messy clump of Q-Tips and lining up another batch of 30 and putting it back into our travel bag.

That'a recent addition to the other rituals I do, like using paper towels to open public restroom doors once I've washed my hands.

Jenny is No Longer Credible...or Easy to Love

My sister told me today that she is going to register as a Republican, and immediately I regretted ever having taught her how to read and for wasting my time and energy taking her to swimming classes at the YMCA.

It's the sort of feeling you get when you break up with a guy after he does something horrible and all the good memories are tainted by the bad thing that he did.

I might as well give her Dixie Chick CDs to burn and a large glass so she can fill it up with that good'ole Republican Kool-Ade.

What's the point of educating these children if they're going to run off and listen to Rush Limbaugh?

But tonight I watched the pilot episode of Shark (which is terrible - and stars James Woods, who I think was the one super-glued by Sean Young) and one of the characters said:

"It's easy to love someone who is easy to love. But when you really love someone, you have to love them when they're not loveable."

When I got off the phone with Jenny, Peter saw I was upset. When I told him about this, he said:

"If she's going to go down that road, that girl's going to lose all her credibility."

Cold Feet

For some reason, right before bed, my feet turn into icicles. I usually try to sneak them onto Peter's feet to warm them up. He used to want to help me out, but he's become less and less amenable to it. Finally today, one week before our two year wedding anniversary, he says to me:

"Nuh-uh. No more. Put on some socks."

This is Who They Hired

As you know, I did not get that copywriter job. Ever since, I have been really curious about who they ended up hiring. This is the newest issue of the magazine and I laughed when I read the first sentence.

"Though the American press may not have known what “secure location” Vice President Cheney was in on September 11, 2001, prompting much idle speculation, Marine Corps Lt. Col. Bob Darling ’87 did, because he was with him."

I mean, what the hell is that?

This reminds me of an interview I saw on TV with a famous chef regarding Rachael Ray.

"Yes, she's very charming. But a chef? I don't think so."

I read this woman's article and my feeling was this:

"I'm sure she's lovely, but a writer? I don't think so."

We Really Missed Liz Cho

Peter and I are back from our three-day vacation in Vermont - well, we thought we were staying in Vermont because the house we rented was advertised as Vermont, but when we got there, it was upstate New York. The old bait-and-switch.

Peter and I watch ABC news with Liz Cho and - without fail - she flubs her lines at least three times during every broadcast. This drives us nuts and Peter says, "Sue Simmons would never do that. She and Chuck Scarborough are total professionals." It also drives us nuts that Liz Cho makes stupid side comments about news stories.

We also think that Scott Clark should stop with his wacky "Out of This World" and just concentrate on doing a real sports report, GODAMMIT. Although, that's not nearly as annoying as Len Berman's "Spanning the World."

So why do we keep watching ABC news?

For some reason, it's the channel the TV's already on when it's time for the news and God forbid we change it.

While we were in not-Vermont, the local newscasters were ridiculous. They kept flubbing their lines every other sentence and making stupid side commentary like nobody's business. Peter looked at me and said, "Maybe I should audition to be a newscaster. I mean, at least I can read."

"I don't understand how they can keep their jobs," I said. "I mean, if I had a job where I made twenty mistakes a day, I would get fired."

Their local weather man wore a white shirt with the cuffs all rolled up. Where was Sam Champion with his impeccable suits and pretty hair? It was all wrong.

The sports report was the last straw.

According to Peter:

"They're leading with the GIRL'S HIGH SCHOOL SOCCER GAME? I don't care HOW GOOD THEY ARE."

"I really miss Liz Cho. I mean, at least she's pretty."

There are Tailies at The Office

Peter and I love the show "The Office," which reminds us of the place we both worked for when we met. We had a boss who clipped his nails in his office and played favorites. Michael is actually a much better boss than the one we had because at least Michael would not have cut people's work hours so that the company could deny them benefits which padded the bottom line and therefore padded his Christmas bonus. Yes, that guy is going to be carried in a handbasket straight to Hell.

What I don't understand about this season in The Office is this:

Why is Jim working at the Stamford office, and why are we subjected to these new Stamford office people?

This happened on "Lost" - during the second season, we were introduced to "The Tailies." They were the survivors who were on the tail end of the plane.

I just want to concentrate on the regular office, I DON'T want to know about these new frat-boy/sorority-girl types and I hope that they go away. I like Pam and Jim. I DO NOT like this new girl the show is foisting on us.

Peter, on the other hand, says he likes the new girl better because "she's prettier."

Me: Even though Pam is better you would pick the other girl because she's prettier?

Peter: (big pause)...Yes.

It's a Turn Lane, People

Our condo complex is right off Bedford Road, which is extremely busy. Usually, the only way to make a left when you come out of our street is to wait for all the cars going left to right to pass by, turn into the turn lane, and then wait to get into the right lane.

But very often, people on the right lane get FREAKED when you get into the turn lane. I guess they don't see the turn lane and assume that you are planning on crashing your car into their car. Sometimes I get a lot of beeps from people, but the other day, a little old lady was screaming at me and giving me various hand gestures.

Get a hold of yourself, people.

It's a turn lane.

Oh, the Places I've Been

All the places I've been - I haven't covered much ground at all...

Peter's so going to kick my ass with this map. Actually, maybe not, he only visited a ton of teeny-tiny European countries and I've got CHINA!

But then again, he got to be a rock star, so I guess he still kicks my butt.



create your own visited country map

The Smoker is at it AGAIN!

That smoker is forever smoking outside. I think he's actually smoking cigars because the smoke is really heavy and dense.

Do you think it would be too passive-aggressive to get the fan and blow the smoke back in his direction?

What to do?

Today I told Peter that we shouldn't be pissed-off at someone who is just minding his own business and he said:

"Well, how would he like it if we kept farting outside HIS window?"

If only we could.